My Response to one Mom's Blog Post on Huffington Post about her kid and an iPhone

I have been off from work the last week and have had more than ample time to catch up on reading, current events, and even did some baking. I was reading an article via Twitter on Huffington Post about a woman who had just bought her 13 year old son an iPhone for Christmas because he is such a responsible kid. She goes on to state that the kid has to follow her contract of rules in order to keep the phone. So while I applaud her for taking the time to come up with such a concept, I am not quite sure that all of  her methods will work.  Here is my responses to her 18 rules let me know if you agree, or disagree and what has worked with your own children?

1-She starts the article stating that the phone is his. Yet this rule clearly states otherwise. This I don't agree with, if you are giving the phone as a gift and your son had to invest none of his own money whatsoever than this should be a no brainer. The phone is his because he will do what we wants with the phone whether you think you "own" it or not.

2- I do agree with knowing the password, not so much to spy unless I am given a reason but if the phone is lost or stolen, there are apps that you can install and knowing the password is a must. It's also comes in handy in case you really do need to check up on your kid, but guess what they can CHANGE the password at anytime without telling you. 

3-If it rings answer it? OK how many teenagers except for maybe a few girls left talk on the phone anymore? Its all about texting. I do agree if your parents call you answer.

4-This one just took all the joy of being a kid with a phone. I do think you should set limits but damn!

5-If you want the kid to focus on real relationships why by the kid a phone in the first place? She even states that she can't wait to "exchange a million text messages' with him, sounds a little hypocritical to me.

6-I do agree if the phone gets damaged as a result of his carelessness he should pay for the replacement, unfortunately this kid wont' have the phone in his possession long enough to let anything happen to it. I also think that if he's old enough to do the things to replace the phone, those should be the same things he did to get the phone in the first place with his own money.

7,8, 9- For me these are kind of redundant and if she is that concerned that her kid may not handle himself properly, or a phone will cause him to lose his morals and decency maybe they should sit down for a chat.

10- 13 year old boy! Nuff said

11-She says her son is not a rude person, so why does she feel the need to keep telling him things he should already know? I do agree the phone should be turned off when you are in places where that by it ringing would be a nuisance.

12- Hmmm coming from a mother who is a blogger. Not sure I agree with this one either or believe it.

13-The fact that she knows her son will laugh at her mentioning him sending pictures of his private parts makes me think that she knows he may be capable of it, or have friends that have already done it. Kids are effing CRAFTY!

14-OK! Leave the phone home sometimes? How is he supposed to answer it when mom and dad call (rule #3)? Why would buy such an expensive and advanced piece of technology f you want him to learn to live without it? She could have just never bought it.

15-This kid can't even choose his own music? What the hell is left in all of this??

16-How about just buying an actual puzzle and you, him and dad can do it together. Game Night anyone?

17- Does she Live in New York City? This things may work in Whoville.

18- What does Dad have to say about this? I do agree with the phone being taken away if he messes up and discussing it.

I have a 17 year old son who just got an iPhone in August we had an upgrade on his account since last year and I had not used it. We waited for the hubbub of the iPhone 5 release and went to Best Buy and got him an iPhone 4 for $50. My son does not have his own Itunes account, if he wants to download any apps whether they are free or not he has to ask me for my password, and I can also see the apps he downloads. I know his passwords to his email account, as well as cell phone and I have never really used them. When we talked about getting him the phone, my main concerns were his safety people being robbed for phones, every day concerned me more than anything. He goes to a really strict all boys private school, phones are allowed but god forbid if they go off. He has never been in trouble in school for his cellphone, in fact hes never been in trouble in school for anything. I did not lay a lot of rules on him about the phone because I want to let him know that I trust him, and its his to use. However if I sense anything funky trust me I will be all up in his business. When he started a Facebook page he was so excited, and it eventually wore off. I deleted my Facebook account last year and have no intent on returning. As a mom, full time employee, and a college student cell phones, have become a way to communicate with your child. I do not want my son to fear using his phone, or leave it at home on purpose because he has a fear of messing up, or just doesn't want to be bothered with me. I want him to know that as with anything else this is a part of his life, but its NOT his life. Although Mrs. Burley-Hoffman has great intentions I do not think they are realistic, and I also think if she has this much concern and fear about her son having this phone, she should have left it in the store.  Or started him out with a less advanced phone and make him earn the iPhone.The times are changing and we whether we change or not, or kids are growing up in the heart of technology. We have to be able to come to a medium where we allow them to live their lives, but never forget that we are their parents and at any given moment we will exercise our rights to do just that.

Peace,

The Diva